Saturday, May 26, 2012

Slim Down Saturday - May 26th

Week 14
Post op Week 12
Starting weight: 316.8
Weight  two weeks ago: 274
Current weight: 267.8
Total loss: 49 pounds

I am still having a hard time believing this is happening to me.  I am on track to be at 50+ pounds lost next week.  I am doing great. Still no fills and my stress is lots less.  This weekend I am going jeep rock crawling with my husband.  I would have never done that 49 pounds ago.  Yall have asked for before/after pics so I have put them together :-)

You will need to scroll for my big before and after pics....

Check out those pants!!  Silver 26/28 capris that now fall off and my current 18/20 pink capris I got from the ladies section NOT the womens AKA Moomoo section!!!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

I'm still here and weight loss update

So I have been mia lately.... Phd finals are a bitch... And a lot in band world has happened.

So stress and my band HATE each other! I was stressing over finals and I developed acid reflux and could not keep anything down.. Not even water. I suffered through about every other day like this with many calls to the doc thinking I had a slip, meds, and a lot of will power. Thankfully I am past that now and since the day after my last final- I have not got sick once!!! That's five whole days so far!!

I have lost tremendously since the last post as well.. At 9 weeks post op to the day today I am down around 42 pounds.... Exact numbers only looked at on Saturdays. I am down 4-5 pants sizes and one pant size STARTS with a big fat 1 folks!!! It might be stretchy pants but I have not bought an 18 since I was like 16 years old. I am able to look for closes in the ladies section... Not the women's moomoo section.

I have flown through NSVs including getting below my lowest known adulthood weight of 278 when I was a senior in high school. I feel great. No back pain... First time since having Dixie. I have tons of energy. I cross my legs all the time and love it and the sides of chairs dont push or even touch me in almost every chair I sit at. I can sit Indian style in the floor for hours while playing with Dixie and it never hurts.

These are all great things and I love my ever changing life but this band has been far from easy. When I am stressed i have what I have referred to as forced bulimia. For the rest of my life, I have to gauge the "swallow rating" of every bite and if it does no pass my test it gets spit into a napkin instead of thrown up later. I have wanted a cinnamon roll for weeks but settled for lightly buttered wheat toast this weekend instead. My stomach is so empty all the time that if I drink milk on an empty stomach in the morning especially my stomach acid will curdle it and it will get stuck in the band as curdled milk... Yep it's real... I was so shocked at what I saw in the sink I looked it up and that's a real lap bad issue for some awesome lucky people like me :-/. I almost lost my pants in Walmart... Starting falling to the floor... Had to tie them with a hair tie the rest of that trip... My ring is like 4 sizes to big and I lost it in my purse one day...I was so afraid it feel off in the bathroom or something.

Anyway that's me right now. The doc is impressed with my results and no fill until my weight loss slows down. He is really surprised my hunger is so curved with just the band... I have Zero fluid inflating it right now... Kinda hopes it stays this way... Especially after the episode my high stress caused the band.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Monday, April 23, 2012

The band has accomplished no other could

As I was concentrating on chewing my half full Chinese buffet takeout (only fill it up with little bits) I started thinking about how the band has changed my eating habits. I have developed these weird habits to keep from getting stuck.
-no herbs or onions... I pick them off if I are them.
- I will eat the insides of veges (some) but never the peel... Even cooked
-I cut everything with a knife
-I chew chew chew and if it's still clumpy I spit it out.
-I drink before a meal but not after unless I want an episode that has to be like death...
- I listen to my stomach for stop signals like I am waiting for an announcement about a sale at my favorite store
-I pick items to eat not because they taste good but because I hope it will go down easy
It's not fun. The band has taken my joy of food away. All the things I loved about food are 4 sushi rolls, eating an entire tomato raw, downing 4 Dr peppers in a day, eating sesame chicken, eating in the car, going through the donut drive through....and so on and so on
I can say all of this because my head hunger is gone... I just miss the old me. I have lost weight but not enough to really impact my life and I am in this middle zone of happiness and sadness. One minute I miss the old me- the next I am amazed at how great I feel.
It's just a weird position to be in.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Slim down Saturday and Naming of the band

Week 8
Post op Week 6
Starting weight: 316.8
Weight last week: 291.4
Current weight: 285.2
Week's loss: 6.2 lbs
 Total loss: 31.6

This week I kicked weight loss ass! I got in the scale and was shocked. I did not expect it especially since I went to the doc Monday and was told I need to start exercising to loose weight faster!!! He said I should be loosing 3-5 pounds a week.

I was also informed I would get a full next month if I am keeping my food down better... Which this week has been full of nothing but bad food days. I ate nothing Friday and Saturday but liquid and yogurt to calm my crazy ass band.... So dubbed Mercedesbecause I knew a girl in school named that and she was a crazy jealous girl who I apparently stole her boyfriend when I moved to a new town and she made me suffer until I got popular and sicked my possy on her crazy ass. My lapband possy is a 24-48 liquid diet so there!

Anyway.. I have hit the 30lbd loss mark and am thrilled. I weigh less then I did when I met my husband, am noticing being comfy in chairs easier, little to no back pain... And I can see my senior year weight( smallest I remember) around the corner. 278.... I need to take official pics's been a while.

Night all :-)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Bad Food Day

bleh...I am highly thinking about only eating dinner because any time I eat at work I get matter if I am with someone, at the office, eating out..does not matter.

I made me a very thin crust pizza (homemade) and ate it for lunch..yep sick as a dog AND in class right now.  LOVELY.  Thankfully a bathroom is right across the hall.

Either this talk of stats and looming deadlines OR this food issue will make me irp.

BLEH - Goodnight!

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Slim Down Saturday Week 7

Week 7
Post op Week 5
Starting weight: 316.8
Weight last week: 293.6
Current weight: 291.4
Week's loss: 2.2 lbs
 Total loss: 25.4 pounds

This is awesome!  I would have lost more if I would have not gotten familiar with some Easter candy.  BLEH.....still no coke though :-)

I also have a HUGE NSV. On Thursday of this week I fit in my first pair of goal jeans...a 22 - non stretch dress pants.  When I started this 7 weeks ago I was in a pair of 28 non stretchy pants.  WOW.  That is amazing to me.  Today I bought me a pair of khaki capris in that size and I plan on buying my next goal pants and a smaller shirt at the end of this month...A size 18!

So while I am not there yet let me say something about this.

One - I am less than 2 pounds from the 280s.  I have not been there in almost 10 years.  We are quickly approaching a goal that I honestly thought was laughable to get to 2 months ago -- my high school weight of around 278.  At that point I wore a 16-18. 

An 18 shirt and pants...its been around 8 years since I wore clothes that did not start with a 2.  I am having weeks where I loose little to nothing but it only lasts a week here and there but let me state that I am THRILLED at my weight loss.  I am averaging 3.6 pounds a week! 

I have a one month check up on Monday and I am hoping that he will release me not to come back until I need a fill....need to save those remaining 8 visits that I have already paid for.  I dont think I need one now.  I each very little and I am still having issues keeping things down if I do not chew like 100 times.  Getting any tighter would be miserable in my opinion.  It would be great if I stay like this without fills.  I think it contributes to me not drinking carbonation -- but that is just my opinion on the way I feel about my body.  My doc is STRONGLY against soda as well..he made me repeat that I would quit them like 5 times when I scheduled my surgery.

Anyway...need to do a few more paper gradings before I go to bed. -- Storms will be here early in the morning.

Monday, April 9, 2012

"Its not even a Secret"

 I have come out of the lapband closet.  I have had people ask me what I have done to loose weight but I have been pretty picky on who I tell. Well today is 1 month with the surgery so I finally said...who cares..let me be an inspiration since its so noticeable.  Who cares if people have a problem with it.

To my face, I have only gotten positive remarks but I have learned how fast gossip travels.

I live and work in Fayetteville, AR - that is the north part of the state.  I work on our satellite campus for a university hospital in the state.  I used to live and work at the main campus in Little Rock - but rarely if ever talk or see pretty much anyone there but one or two people.  I told one person in LR about my surgery and swore her to secrecy until I was ready. Like a great friend she abided by my wishes and did not tell a soul.

So anyway.....
I was talking to her today and discussing the huge difference in those two pics below and she was like...oh yeah so and so asked me why I did not tell her about your surgery.  I was the hell does she know. I have not seen her...even through video conference in almost a year!  Apparently madame so and so did not want to share her gossip trail but proclaimed "What?  Its not even a secret!"


How many people over the past month have sat around the lunch table in two areas of the state discussing my weight loss?  I thought it was just me and my close friends and family but apparently its an entire college within said university hospital.   Mind you - me and this particular group of people do not get along that well and have a "work history" that is tainted like a bad relationship where your best friend dates your one true love in junior high....YEAH  one of those.


I just can not get over how madame so and so and all these other people know. I tell a few people on my campus and BAM its front page university news. 

All and all I really do not I was prepared for this and I accept it now since I have got past the 20 lbs loss mark but still...nothing irks me more then people who gossip about me....especially those people where we have a tainted past.

More progress with pics

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Progress in pics

So I took a picture this morning with Dixie for Easter and I do see a difference. :-)
1st pic is about three months before surgery and the second is from today- Easter 2012

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Brenda Ave,Lincoln,United States

Slim down Saturday. Kinda

Week 6
 Post op Week 4
 Starting weight: 316.8
Weight last week: 294.0
Current weight: 293.6
Week's loss: .4 lbs
 Total loss: 23.2 pounds

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Lincoln,United States

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Woman dies of over exertion of taste buds

I knew when getting the band that my life would change.... In numerous ways. Today however, that has really hit home.

I had to go to Wal-Mart to get diapers for Dixie.... Thankfully there is a neighborhood market on the way home. Anyway, I am searching the aisles for something for my hungry husband to eat and NOTHING appeals to me.. I mean nothing. My mind goes trough this weird new conversation like:

Little Debbie brownies yum- eh I don't want to gain weight.

Pancakes-- I really need some wheat flour but I had bread at breakfast

Chicken its my fav - uh no don't want that special kind of stuck hell

Pizza- damn crust

That's fried, that's breaded, that will be too dry...

It went on aisle after aisle. So I decided to make Stephen some tacos. I could eat the insides with no tortilla.

Which leads me to my next life changing moment.. How the list of foods I can't eat keeps expanding.

Bread?? Oh no I can have that.. No problem at all.

Raw veges. Even salsa..that's a big fat stuck episode staring me down. Have I mentioned that I am Southern and used to be known to eat a tomato like an apple!! This no no food breaks my heart like chicken does.

Corn is on that list 2.

I have about decided that the only way to get my veges in is through v8 juice... Which honestly tastes like a rotten tomato to me😂. Maybe the spicy will have a nice... Bloody Mary type flare to it.

Oh and let's not get me started on how my favorite fast food summer drink is now to sweet for me: frozen strawberry lemonade... Or that the hot chocolate with no whip cream and chocolate drizzle I got today had to be watered down because it was to sweet 2.

I guess my taste buds are going boring on me. If I was to ever again drink a Dr pepper, I may die of taste-bud shock! I can just picture that headline posted all over yahoo news now: Woman dies of over exertion of taste buds. Hahah

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Saturday, March 31, 2012

Slim Down Saturday - Post Op Week 3

Week 5
 Post op Week 3
 Starting weight: 316.8
Weight last week: 298.0
Current weight: 294.0
Week's loss: FOUR Pounds!!
 Total loss: 22.8 pounds


I can not express how happy I am. I have zipped right past the 20 pounds lost mark and I weigh less now then I did when I met my husband...not much less though.  :-)  The next goal is to be at m high school weight!  It really is hard to take all of this in.  I am still wearing all the same clothes that I have in my closet but I have been able to wear jeans that have been laughing at me since I got pregnant in November of 2009.

I am doing good - learning to chew chew chew and slow down when eating.  I am now on all foods and so I am going to slowly try different foods to see what works for me and what does not.  My head hunger for the past few days has been minimal.  There really is not anything that I am in the mood to eat...just taking it nice and easy and moving on forward.  

Dixie is going to sleep for her nap right now and I have been working on some spring cleaning.  I tried a flour-less oatmeal pancake was not that bad. I will post the recipe and pics shortly on my recipes page that I am going to open up to the public. 

Goals for next week -

Drink more water!!
Take my vitamins nightly.
Get some spring cleaning done.
Start tracking what I eat.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Rumble gurgle plop

So I am laying in bed while my daughter goes to sleep and there is this HUGE noise that startles her and makes her sit up. Is it the dog, a car horn, or even thunder???? Uh No, it's my freaking stomach!!! I am not hungry.. Well I don't feel hungry but that thing is making some crazy weird sounds in there. It sounds like someone is wringing it out... Like a diver jumping into a pool of jello PLOP!

Anyway, I tried drinking something warm this morning and it made me feel much better. I don't drink coffee or hot tea so I got some sugar free hot cocoa for those super tight mornings.

Tomorrow is my weigh in and I am hoping for a loss. As usual, I took a peak at my weight on Wednesday but after two days ( wed and Thurs) Of bad food days there is no telling what that scale will say.

I am feeling much more active and am hoping to get a room spring cleaned this weekend... Unless of course we win the Mega Millions and I can hire a maid :-)


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, March 29, 2012

human plunge

I want to talk about my new discovery...the importance of One Single Bite.  For the most part, I am doing good with food.  Not sure what my weight loss is this week but I am drinking water and trying to stay healthy.  A new development has appeared however and I do not like it...spitting, sliming, PB'ing...whatever you want to call has now made its home with me. 

I have not had any dramatic episodes and while it does hurt, I can quietly and calmly take care of it within a few hours of eating each time it happens.  At first, I thought it was an issue with the food I was I changed it kept happening.  So what is the deal.

It just dawned on me....its not chewing one stupid little bite enough at some point during the meal.  This is ridiculous.  I feel like crap for hours because I forgot to chew enough on one bite...and it comes back to haunt me.

Of course to get to feel better and get that pesky large item up, I am spitting and sliming the remnants of what I have ate that has me all clogged up.  Its like I have become a human plunge.

I have got to remember to chew chew chew...but in the heat of the moment when I am eating..I don't always remember 100% of the time.  I need to tattoo it on my hand or something so I see it ever time I pick up a dang fork.

Does this happen to anyone else?  Should I be concerned? 

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Slim Down Saturday

Week 4
Post op Week 2
Starting weight: 316.8
Weight last week: 298.0
Current weight: 298.0
Week's loss: a big fat ZERO
Total loss: 18.8 pounds

So while I am bummed about the 0 loss, I totally get it.  I am eating now and going from basically nothing after surgery to least I did not gain!!  I also think I am a weird lap band patient.  I have tried a few different foods and I absolutely CANNOT do cooked broccoli (not even trying raw) but I can do a pancake or even a piece of pizza (well a bite).   In fact, I am sure that the few nights of pancake and egg for dinner is why I did not loose anything.

I feel good and I know what I need to do to work on weight loss next week:
  • Exercise
  • Not eating out
  • No syrup!!!!
  • No syrup!!!
  • I also bought smaller sizes of greek parfait.  I am sure I will be full with it and maybe something else for breakfast...not sure what egg maybe...
I am off to try and do some exercise for a few minutes while Dixie is out riding in the jeep with her daddy.  :-)  

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Head hunger and I am old

I am sitting here drinking a low sodium V8 juice and all I can think about is a cheeseburger. I want one soooo bad. I am happy with the top bun gone as well....just let me have the rest. The only non mushy thing I have tried is chicken so it will be a few weeks before I attempt to eat said burger but jeeze this head hunger is killing me.

Does head hunger ever go away? Will eating a burger in a few weeks (even if it's just like a bite) help or make it worse?

Now on to the really sad news, this surgery has turned me into an old woman and I have proof:

All but one is vitamins... And yes one is a flint stone's chewable but still.... A pill organizer. I did not plan to have one of these for like another 40 years.... Guess that's the price I have to pay to get supermodel hot. ;-)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Monday, March 19, 2012

Just moving right along

I have not been on the scale since Saturday - which is a record for me since I started this process a few weeks ago.  I am trying to go till Saturday so I can be surprised. 

I am trying thicker foods...yogurt - LOVE greek yogurt with fruit and I had mashed potatoes tonight.  I have also incorporated small amounts of real food to see how I can handle it. 

The only thing I am dealing with is the very tight feeling of fullness I get when I eat very little. No matter what it is I eat, I get this feeling of fullness that I have never had before.  I know it is being full because it dissipates and is just my normal full after about 15 minutes. 

Hope everyone is well...watching Smash :-)

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Slim Down Saturday

Week 3
Post op Week 1
Starting weight: 316.8
Weight last week: 309.2
Current weight: 298.0
Week's loss: 11.2 pounds!!
Total loss: 18.8 pounds


Wow - 11.2 pounds in one week post op..thats awesome!!  I dont feel hungry and I am not having any problems or complications aside from some port tugging which I read is to be expected for a few weeks.  I have not really worked out..been busy dealing with a sick baby and a midterm statistics test.  I went to the doc and he is very impressed with my current progress.  He wants to see me in a month after I am on solid food to see how I am doing.  I am guessing then he will let me come back when I stop loosing weight regularly for a fill.  I have 9 more visit before I have to start paying for visits so I hope I keep staying full pretty easy.

After talking to him, I have moved on to full liquids and ate some yogurt.  Greek yogurt is awesome and lots of protein.  I am trying different brands to find the kind I like the most.  I also just made my first smoothie.   :-)

Well Dixie is being CRAZY so thats all for now.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Working out the Soreness!

So I am trying really hard to work out the soreness from the surgery.  I am feeling much better today then I was yesterday!  I am not taking pain meds like I did yesterday and I got a good amount of stuff done. 

To try to remedy this soreness I got on my elliptical and did 100 very very slow strides.  The point was in no way to take off calories...since I am really not eating anything at all...but more to get this soreness gone a little better then walking will do.

I am also a little concerned about what I am eating....which is pretty much nothing.  The protein shake is a little thick for me right now.  I am pretty much drinking water and trying to get down 2 protein shakes...but so far am not that successful. 

I made some brussel sprouts for my husband and I sucked the juice out of two of those with no problem but I am really concerned about my nutrition.  Tomorrow I am going to go to the store and get some protein powder, and some vitamins.  I want to make sure I do not bottom out. 

I am not hungry at all but I need to make sure I get nutrition to stay healthy. - especially since I have a midterm this Thursday!

Saturday, March 10, 2012

I'm Banded and Slim Down Saturday

Well its official I AM BANDED!!!  The surgery took about 1.5 hours.  We got to the hospital at around 7:45 and I got home around 1 that afternoon. 

I am doing much better today as far as staying awake but I am sticking to that 4 hour window for my pain meds.  I am really sore but trying to get up and move around about every 30 minutes.  The worst was waking up this morning after not having meds for 12 hours or so. 

My mother in law has wonderfully taken Dixie for the weekend and that has helped me to be able to recoop on my time.  Being able to sleep without a waking baby in the middle of the night was rough getting in and out of bed...the port entrance stretches a bit and it is pretty sore.

On another note lets talk weight -

So thanks to Aunt Flo's visit...who decided to come the day before surgery (and has not been around in months) I gained 4 pounds of the 10 I lost.  The day of Surgery I weighed 310.0.

This morning for my slim down Saturday - even thought I was just out of surgery, I went ahead and weighed and I am down to 309.2.

I am now one day post op and dealing with the protein shake diet.  I have a doctors appointment next Thursday (might change to Friday since I have a test that day) and we will see how things progress.

Can I say that I am tired of Vanilla and Chocolate shakes...going to get some unflavored protein powder and come up with some other shake options.  Never thought I would be sick of Chocolate.  :-)

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

It's almost here and the devil scale

So at midnight tomorrow I go NPO for my surgery. I have been so nervous about it I kinda went Mia on social media for a few days. I am really concerned that I am going to wake up and Dr. S is going to say "sorry your liver was too fatty and we could not put it in"!

I got so worried in fact that I called the doc to talk to them about it. They assured me that if I have lost that much weight 6-10 lbs and eating healthy then the liver is shrinking.

So I'm fine until I get on that damn scale again. No matter what I eat or really what I do not eat, I am slowly gaining back those damn 10 lbs!!

What the hell. I have gained 4 of the 10 back since Sat night. All I am eating is grilled chicken and freaking lettuce. What's the damn deal?

So now I am all freaked out all over again. I swear if my scale did not have a memory of my past weigh ins, I would think I dreamed all last weeks weight loss!!

Aunt flo is all jacked up with me and I thought maybe it was preparing for a camp out at my house but no such tent has been put up yet. Maybe it's the fact that Dixie has been having constant nightmares for the past two nights and to keep her from getting attached to our bed I have slept half of the past two nights in the floor...and I am stressed!!!

I am on (what all the women in my family refer them as) anti- bitch pills which puts me at a calm collected state and the fact that I have a midterm coming up and this surgery shows I have stress even 50mg of Prestiq can't even mellow out.

I have never done anything like this before. Its a whole new life. I will never be this large again! I will see an image of myself in the mirror that I have NEVER met. It's's insane and it's amazing all at the same time.

Jeez he better not tell me my liver is to fatty!!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Bleh Sunday

Lets just say today was not a good food day for me today!  I wanted to eat everything I saw.  I ate a piece of Dixie's pancake I made her, tried a tater tot and honestly could have ate an entire cheese burger if my husband would have bought the one I wanted for me. 

I am ready for when I have the band and can eat real least then if I want to splurge and eat to get the taste of a nice juicy burger I can...even if it is only part of that burger.  The thought of doing something that makes me not get this surgery really freaks me out. 

I am also thinking about making a google site with recipes that I create during each stage of the lapband experience...liquids, mushys, ext.  Thought that might help people. 

What do yall think??  Is there one already out there?

I need to keep this up and remember these three statements.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Slim Down Saturday and New Blog Name

So its SLIM DOWN Saturday for this future bandster!  Today is officially my 8th day on the pre-op diet and the totals are in...I lost TEN pounds. Yep you heard right...ten pounds in one week without the band!

I am so excited.  Today was a whole lot easier then last Saturday - my first day in when I thought I could fry up and eat my own leg if I could be brave enough to cut it off.  I am still having troubles drinking those stupid protein shakes but I bought TONS so I will be suffering through them for a while. 

To commemorate this occasion, I have changed my blog name to the Incredible Shrinking Woman!  Yep - thats me.  :-)  I am living on around 400 calories (today much less) a day and that attributes to the weight loss but its great prep work to what I have ahead for me.

My Mood today - great!!
This time next week - I will be 1 day post op with the band!  Its already paid for..and now I am just waiting for the day to show up!!

Night everyone...I have a big day ahead tomorrow of cleaning, clothes washing, and paper grading.  -- Also hoping to check out my new followers and follow their blogs and do some commenting.

Friday, March 2, 2012


Thanks to Drazil its BYOC time!

1. Since I talked about psychics this week - I'm curious....if you could see one for free and you could only ask one question - what would it be?

What will I be doing as a career in 15 years?

2. What's your favorite ice cream flavor and topping?

Rocky road for sure!!

3. What's your preferred method of working out? DVDs, an external gym, gym inside your home, classes?

Elliptical at home

4. If you work outside the home or if you ever did or will in the future - do you think it's better/easier to work with men or woman? Who do you work mostly with now?

Men! I am friends with women but men are much easier to deal with. IT is a men's world. I don't mind it but there is the occasional BMS - Bitchy Male Syndrome.

5. Repeat question. Summarize your week in real life and in blog land.

It's been trying but good all around. I have gotten a lot of support from everyone on the blogs on doing my pre-op and that's great!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Carb counting queen

I am 5 days into my 14 day pre-op diet journey.  I have lost some weight but waiting to post until Saturday to get a week total.  I feel pretty good and I am watching my food and fluid intake like I have never done before.  I am still food journaling on my Food Journal page.

It really is amazing to me how you can feel full off of such little food - but it does go away quickly with no band.... 

I am going to add it as a NSV but yesterday I picked some popcorn chicken up for my husband (my absolute FAVORITE thing from Sonic) and I did not even take 1 bite.

On the down side, I did take a drink of a sprite today but just one drink and then I dumped the rest out.

Anyway...I have my stats class tonight and today was Dixie's first day at her new pre-school so got to get back to the grind. 

Have a great afternooon Band Land!!


Tuesday, February 28, 2012


Hey guys... Not much to say tonight. I am making it..just finished day 4 of preop. It's really stormy here tonight and I started not feeling well about an hour ago. I think I am dehydrated. I am making a goal to drink at least 4 of my glasses of water tomorrow. It is about 16 ounces per glass. Anyway... Heading to bed to get some sleep since I am sure I will be up later when the storms hit our area! I can already hear the wind picking up and the dry line is still in western Oklahoma.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:NW Arkansas

Monday, February 27, 2012

My Doc and the Pre-Op diet

So after two days of TORTURE...I decided to look further into the Liver Shrinking diet.  My doctor, who is wonderful but clearly has ADD, told me to follow the pre-op diet in the book (which there was none) but he did say the goal was to shrink the liver.  I looked EVERYWHERE in cyberspace for a diet plan that makes moderate since and is close to liquid only with protein emphasis as I could find.   I decided on this:

The thing that I am most interested in is the 40-50 net carbs a day MAX.  This really helps me to make sure I am in my range. 

Seeing as I normally eat a WHOLE lot more then that and live off of fried foods and Dr. Pepper's I would say the change I am making - even if there is an egg and a piece of chicken here and there is AMAZING!  I have a clear enough head to admit that now.  Yesterday...not so much.

The protein shake is getting much better.  I am adding a 1/4 teaspoon of non sweetened cocoa to them to help give them a better taste. I don't think I will have to do that forever..just while I get used to it. 

My mood - much better today :-)

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Is this weekend over yet?

Holy Crap - I feel like my stomach is going to jump out of my throat and find a new owner...and honestly at this point I wish I did not have a stomach.  I don't know what is hardest...having a husband and daughter that still gets to eat (I know they have to) or that I have read all these posts on the internet about other bandsters that got to each something they actually chewed. 

The protein shakes are HORRIBLE. I have this huge stock of them and after the surgery they will be used as a smoothly base because they most definitely need some help otherwise. 

At this point I would eat anything regardless of the taste.....nothing added to canned tuna, lettuce leaves, one bite of a meat..any meat. 

Is being skinny worth this?  YES but do I need reminding?? YES!

I am making it...i am ...but I am not happy about it - or in good spirits.

The only bright side is that I don't have a headache today like I did yesterday from no caffeine. 

Maybe a big glass of crystal light will lighten my spirits...going to get some now!!

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Going through Food Detox and you guys bringing me to tears!!

So today has been absolute HELL.  I started the pre-op liquid diet and it is really difficult.  The hungry part isnt as bad as the dreaming of food.  All last night I had dreams of food and when I took a nap with my little girl today I had a dream about Sonic's popcorn chicken.  These protein shakes are MISERABLE and I am pretty irritable.  To top it off, I bought all kinds of boxes of jello and they got lost. I must have left them in my buggy Friday because I was in such a hurry to get to daycare to pick of Dixie.

So - when all was expected to be lost and I would be in sorrow for the next two weeks going through what I can only describe as food detox..I get on my blog and I have 17 FOLLOWERS.  That's amazing...AND people have posted some wonderful comments including my favorite that I am beautiful.  I am still crying from seeing all the amazing support and I am so glad that LBG sent everyone my way!  I feel like I am in this awesome club now with people that get it.  Thank you all so much!

I bought a new scale that is more accurate so I am off to take my 1st day Pre-op weight and pics.  Will post later.

Good night Lapbandia!

Friday, February 24, 2012


So I am working on plans for goals..mainly for two because I actually see that it is possible and two because I want to reward myself for fun.  :-)

I used to always have a goal with food but since learned that was not the right thing to do...DUH! So now I am thinking of completely childish things that I want to do for myself that the normal woman can and I never have....some are super stupid but hey...might as well treat yourself for a change!

Some that I have thought of so far...with no real clue where to put them....
  • $1000 for new clothes
  • Photo shoot of new me
  • Beach vacation (this one is for when I can wear a bikini and not make everyone go blind)
  • Tan in a tanning bed (always afraid to put my fat ass in there)..haha
  • go public (keeping this social media quiet for a while)
  • massage
  • get a makeover
  • night out with the girls
  • mommies day out - do something all by myself.

Any other ideas??

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Some Before Pics

Around Dec 2007 - Engagement Pics - If I remember correctly - I weighed around 290 around this time -- thats 40 pounds lighter then I do now.

2011 - Dixie was around 7 months old I think

Sept 2011 - Weigh in at what I do now..around 330 - in all my fat faced glory

awesome arms...just freaking awesome ---bleh

Right after I had Dixie in Sept 2012 - weighed around 320 or so

Back to work after maternity leave around Nov 2010...really good angle for me..dont let it fool you though...those arms are still there..haha

around the same time...see that was just a really good angle

yep around the same time again

August 2, 2011 - Dixie's 1 year birthday party.

Its Official!

On Monday Feb 20th - The doctor said that I was approved for surgery and it is booked for MARCH 9th!  I start my liquid diet on Saturday.  I am pretty sure I am ready...I have my friends and family doing a week of "last meals" and I honestly starting to not be excited about tasting it.  I bought these Oreo cookies like two days ago and I have not ate them yet!

I am really nervous about it but excited at the same time.  More posts to come.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Tomorrows the day

In less then 12 hours I will be at my consultation.  I have tried not thinking about it but of course..its all I can think about right now!!

I am a nervous wreak.  To top it all off I am not telling my mom right now and its the first time I have kept something from her for this long since I was little.  I mean I told her I was pregnant like 10 minutes after I found out.  I feel kind of guilty but this is about me and while I love my mother - she has a tendency to make it about her and I 100% guarantee that as soon as she finds out she will discover some new amazing weight loss thing or surgery she is going to do as well.  I do not mind if she does that but again....this is for me and I need to keep my focus on that not on other people 's journeys.  Once I know that I can do this and I can focus on me..I will tell her.  She may kill me but it will probably be after the surgery.

I will report back to the cyber world what the results are sometime tomorrow.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Speaking to the empty space of this blog....

So I know no one is reading this but I have to tell someone so here goes...On Monday Feb 20th - I am scheduled to see the doctor in Grove OK about the Lapband. He is having a special on pricing and I hope that I qualify since I am a self pay.  I am a nervous wreak and its all I think about. What if I go in and he tells me I am to large for the higher price??  I can't afford it if its much more then 10,000 and I am now so looking forward to the changes that I can barely contain myself.

Not an hour goes by where I do not think about the possibilities of being skinny.  The last time I was in the 100's I was like in 5th grade.  I have been big every since I was child.  Recently I found out it was because I was  was depressed.

In November of 2010 - Veterans day - my husband - Stephen - and I spent my entire day off fighting like cats and dogs. Back then we did not fight like gripe gripe and then done.  It was full on scream fest with both of us threatening divorce.  Finally I stopped and saw myself and could not figure out who I was.  Why was I acting like this?  He really is not this bad of a person - why am I so hostile and then it hit me.  I have that terrible disease that I have long since thought passed me even though every other woman in my family had it.  I had DEPRESSION! 

Not a week later, I went to the doctor and we got me on some great meds. I started seeing results in about a week.  I have been on the meds for 3 months now and our life is so different. We do not fight - we enjoy each others company, he is helping around the house AND I see it, and believe it or not somehow it has impacted the way we spend money and we are saving money much more then ever before. 

I had thought about weight loss surgery for years but rarely gave it much thought because I was so attached to food.  It was what comforted me when everything else let me down....why would I give up the ability to eat as I pleased and what I wanted??  After the meds kicked in - I started noticing a clear change in my mentality toward food.  I did not have to have it.  I ate when I was hungry.  I ate chocolate like once a few weeks instead of daily.  I do still have a love for Dr. Pepper though. 

I mentioned it in passing to Stephen that maybe one day I could get the lap band but I left it at that.  He spent one night after I went to bed researching it and then found this great deal by a surgeon about an hour away.  Then to my amazement we got approved for financing for 77% of the surgery.  '

So here I am....two days from the day of truth...the day I learn if all this excitement and dreaming was worth it.  The day I find out if I will be spending the amount of money some people spend on used vehicles to get a few incisions and a band around my stomach.  Will I be spending thousands of dollars to be on a liquid diet for two weeks....for the start of weight loss that will continue with thousands more on plastic surgery for loose skin - for a surgery that will put me at a weight that I have not seen since I was a small child!!

There are cons..I am not going to lie and my husband and I are prepared to accept big one is that if I loose all this weight, I do not expect to want to have another child for quite a few years.  I am quite content with my wonderful daughter but Stephen really wants a boy.  With the money we are spending, we could pay off my car - renovate our master bathroom - pay 1/7 of our house off....but instead we are going to spend it on me....I kinda feel bad..then I go look at the thousands of success stories and before and after pics and remind myself that there is a very large possibility that by my five year anniversary with my husband March 22, 2013 - I may be able to buy a dress for our date that is strapless and in the normal section instead of the plus size.  I have NEVER bought clothes that were not in the plus size section (and all those big girls out there know just like I do that those close are always so much prettier then the ones they make for us)!!

Monday, February 13, 2012

Pondering the world of Lapandia!

Hello World.  My name is Victoria.  I am 26 years old and like many people in my situation I am overweight and have been for pretty much my entire life.  I have started this blog because I am pondering the world of lapandia and I need to get my thoughts out to people that know what I am going through.

Current Stats:

Weight: 333 lbs
Height: 5'3"
I will be self pay!
I have researched everything known to man..just need real peoples experiences now.

I have a consultation on Feb 20th.